RANT 'N' RAVE
ENGLISH ONLY please
Hi everyone. My name’s Ray. No, wait,
that’s wrong. My name is RAYMOND. Capital letters only. MCAVOY RAYMOND THOMAS, to be
exact. You’ll have to forgive me; I sometimes get confused myself.
This problem never even crossed my mind as an exchange student in lovely Nara, where our
ID cards had both English and katakana. But just a few months ago, it reared its ugly head
as I attempted to get my very own keitai phone. I went into the shop and had a look at the
latest models, and a red Tu-Ka caught my fancy.
Because my name sounds like the Japanese rei (zero), I wanted a phone number with
as many zeroes in it as possible. So I figured I’d endure the hassle of dealing with
these rather rude people if it meant getting that cool red phone with its even cooler
number. But it was not to be. At least, not on the day I applied.
I soon got a phone call at my office telling me that I had “misspelled” my name
and, thus, my contract was not valid. Misspelled? Hmm? I went down there again and asked.
Seems that the katakana that I used to write my name on the form were not allowed. My name
had to be in English only. Last name, then first, then middle. And in all capitals.
“It has to be exactly as written in your passport,” they said. “Foreigners
have to write with English letters.”
Now this bugged me almost-no, more than-having to wait another day to get the phone:
“Feel free to come to our country; just don’t try to use our language except
when we tell you to.” Never mind that postal employees make all kinds of mistakes
when trying to deliver letters addressed in romaji to gaijin houses. Never mind that in
the Japanese language, katakana are already set aside to designate foreign names and
words. Never mind that names in Japanese passports are in romaji. (The signature is in
whichever alphabet the holder wishes to sign in.)
What about Russians and Arabs who grow up using their languages’ alphabets, only to
find that when they come here, their names are converted into not Japanese but English?
That’s what they’ll have to use if they want one of these telephones (or do a
lot of other official things in daily Japanese life). Is this yet another barrier put up
by the powers that be to prevent foreigners from learning Japanese? (Longtime residents
may recall TV anchor Hiroshi Kume’s comment that “it would be better if
foreigners spoke only broken Japanese.”)
In most of the world, one of the first things immigrants do is learn how to write their
names-and here, we can’t even have them! Our voices must be heard! We won’t put
up with such linguistic segregation! March right down to your ward office or city hall and
demand to have a name! And tell them MCAVOY RAYMOND THOMAS sent you.
Many thanks to reader Ray McAvoy for this Rant. |
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