RANT 'N' RAVE
Tegami Or Not Tegami
Before I begin attacking an absurd matter
of protocol down at your local post office, I must state that on whole I've found the
Japanese postal system to be reliable and efficient. I have experienced a variety of
postal shortcomings in other parts of the world. Korean postage stamps, for example, lack
any adhesive, necessitating the use of glue sticks provided just beyond reach behind the
attendant's window. The typically aggressive Korean male behind the counter always seizes
this opportunity to backhand your parcels, stamps and whatnot aside and commence his own
postal activities.
There is one thing, however, I have yet to experience in any post office outside Japan:
the significant increase in postage resulting not from an increase in physical weight,
but rather a sort of "philosophical" weight.
I self-produce and promote my own experimental music CDs and I quite often mail small
packages to destinations outside Japan which usually consist of one CD plus a brief
explanation of what the music is all about and why I use so many samples of Ronald Reagan.
This brief explanation, which Japanese postal officials insist on referring to as a tegami
(letter) is usually nothing more than 25 to 30 words scrawled onto a small sheet from a
memo-pad. It didn't take long for me to realize that an affirmative response to the one
word inquiry, "tegami?," was the equivalent of taking JY110 out of my pocket and
tossing it into a river.
Although it is true that the inclusion of an extremely small piece of paper including ink
will increase the weight of a package by about three trillionths of a gram, there is no
relationship between this weight and the increase in postage. My packages are always
weighed before the tegami question. I believe it is common in all countries, as a matter
of thoroughness and safety, to identify all the contents of a package before sending. But
in my experience Japan is the only country which requires extra payment for the inclusion
of any self-written communication on principle. Spending far too much time pondering any
possible explanation for this, I can arrive only at one. Perhaps in Japan, where the
written word is so revered, even a mere 25 to 30 words on a scratch pad possesses some
sort of "spiritual" weight. Whatever the real explanation is, there is one very
clear course of action I wish to impart to all postal customers residing in Japan.
When you are cutely asked by the attendant, "tegami?" you should cutely reply
"no" or "iie." It is something they NEVER verify visually.
JY110 may not seem like much, but when you consider that that sum is added to a pre-total
of about JY400, it becomes clear how disproportionate that charge is to the postage for
the weight of the package alone. Besides, after mailing just a few packages and answering
no every time, I save enough to go make a day of it down at my local batting center. I
have some complaints about that place too, but I'll save that rant for next time.
Many thanks to reader Randy Simpson for this Rant. |
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